It's been a while since my last blog post.

Not too much has changed between now and then, but I have a few new passing thoughts and observations.

First, spring is back and I'm starting to feel somewhat normal again. The green grass and flowering trees activated something in my brain that made me feel a bit more like a human being than I have for the last few months. I never think "this is seasonal depression" but the difference when the seasons shift reminds me of what I'm supposed to feel like. Now I just want to eat fresh fruit and vegetables, drink lemonade and read a book/sketch/or just take a nap out in the sun in my hammock again. (Note to self. Get thing to put my hammock on now that I have my own place and can just... do that now.)

(Word of advice that a super outdoorsy friend gave me: you can get a cheap knockoff eno from walmart or target to save money, but get the eno straps because they're heavy duty and much easier to use than rope. She was definitely right. I fucking love the eno straps.)


Second. I've always wanted to keep carnivorous plants.

Now that my brain is starting to wake up to the fact that I like... have my own place and can just do things that I've always been curious about, I started doing research and ordered a couple. A venus fly trap (Dionaea muscipula), a pitcher plant (Sarracenia sp.), and a sundew (Drosera sp.). Apparently these three are a good starting point for beginners, and I'm really hoping that I'll be able to keep them alive and thriving. Apparently they're relatively low maintenance but just have different needs than most other plants. Essentially, they thrive with a lot of light and water, but the soil and water needs to have a very low mineral content. So, distilled water instead of tap and low-mineral soils like peat moss and sand. I'm really excited to see how they turn out once everything is set up!

(I'll add my own photos of the plants here if all goes well.)


Finally, therapy.

I've been trying to get an intake appointment with a therapist's office for a few years now, but ran into several issues with insurance compatibility, offices not taking new patients, or just flat out not getting a response.

Today, though, I had my intake appointment!

I felt good about my therapist, and I'm optimistic for how things will shake out down the line. I think I'm ready to work through several things I've had issues with for basically my entire life, and I actually want to get better and enjoy being alive.

Like, now that I have a steady job and a (hopefully) permanent healthy situation, I've been able to step back and go "Oh. Yeah. Guess I'm in a good spot to actually be a better version of myself now that I'm not (metaphorically) running through the woods and fighting for my fucking life."

Here's hoping!


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